I’m back. Sorry it has definitely been so long since I’ve posted and talked about what’s actually going on in my life. Just a warning, I am getting really personal and going in depth about the stuff happening inside my body. After doing weeks of extensive research I feel like I have a much better understanding of my diagnosis and I want to share my story to maybe help some ladies going through the same thing. 

This situation has been going on for a while now, but only recently has it started actually affecting me negatively. I was recently diagnosed with PCOS, which is polycystic ovary syndrome. For the past two months I have been dealing with irregular periods and abnormally heavy cycles. At one point, I was on my period for 4 weeks straight. This is really odd for me because I have been on birth control since I was 16. I’ve always struggled having completely messed up ovaries. The day before my 16^th birthday party, I was rushed to the hospital because there was something seriously wrong with my right ovary and everyone thought I ruptured my appendix. I wish that was the case, but unfortunately, I had a huge cyst on my ovary that ruptured. It was too much for my body to clean on its own, so I had to get it surgically cleaned out. That was one of the absolute worst pain I have ever felt in my life and it really sucks because I didn’t even know this was a problem until I was randomly in the hospital. I got on birth control not for contraception reasons but just to regulate all these cysts from growing. Regularly I’d go to the gynecologist and get ultrasounds of my ovaries, just to be told that my cysts were still there. 

It goes without thinking that you should regularly get your genitals checked regardless of your gender. There’s no way of knowing a problem is occurring if you’re not proactive about your health. I know from experience that it’s better to catch a problem early on and manage it before it gets out of control. For so many years, I have been dealing with constant pain in my uterus and continuous cyst growth on both my ovaries. I want to talk more about PCOS and what it means. Basically, it just means that I have a ring of cysts around my ovaries that will be there for my life. There is no way to simply get rid of these growths, just have to live through it. This doesn’t mean I absolutely can’t have kids but getting pregnant won’t be the easiest thing. Not that I want to get into this subject, but I have always thought about adopting my kids if I chose to have any. I personally think there are just too many kids in the world already that do not have a good home. 

Throughout the years, I’ve found ways to manage my pain and try my best to control growths. I take my birth control consistently at the same time, so my body is used to that amount of hormones in the morning. I also take iron supplements because I am anemic and recently my periods have been oddly heavy, so I’ve been losing more blood than normal. For anyone who is anemic, you know how annoying it is whenever you stand up and suddenly your lightheaded as heck. I’ve been working on my diet by eating far less chips and more veggies. Especially spinach, asparagus and tomatoes. Another supplement that I started taking is cranberry. After much research, I decided to try it because cranberries are helpful in preventing UTIs and provide an array of antioxidants that help build your immune system while giving you energy too. A weird symptom of PCOS is hair loss and I talked before about me losing hair because of DevaCurl too. Not that I’m bald or anything but I have a lot of hair that falls out whenever I shower. I have been taking a lot of biotin and hair, skin and nail vitamins. It seems that now all my past problems are being solved by prioritizing my health and putting the right stuff in my body. Who would of thought?

Aside from me talking about my trash ovaries, after finding out all this new stuff about my body, I came back to Denton and got really sick. I have no clue what it actually is though, I tested negative for corona and I don’t normally get so sick in the middle of summer. Both my parents were positive for coronavirus and I was just staying with them for weeks whenever I had to go back home to deal with these stupid ovaries. At the start of this week I had a fever, body aches, sore throat and was constantly throwing up for 3 days. For the past 4 days, I haven’t had a fever and I feel a million times better than I did a week ago. I don’t feel one hundred percent back to normal, but I feel okay. My body basically shut down for a few days and I had absolutely no energy to even move. I’m working on strengthening my immune system and have been taking elderberry which is a natural medicine. Even though I was negative for covid, I haven’t been hanging out with my friends or going out anywhere. I want to continue to emphasis the fact that we are all humane and not immune to everything the world throws at us. I’m still encouraging everyone to wear masks when you go out in public and you are consciously protecting other people’s health. 

Hello sweet angels, I hope you all are taking time to go outside and be grateful for the beaming sunshine. Recently, in light of what has been happening in the world I’ve taken a step back from posting on social media and have been absorbing other people’s perspectives. In my opinion, with what we are going through in the world right now I think it is best to revert back from focusing on ourselves and work together as a human race to ensure that everyone feels their life is meaningful. It breaks my heart to see so much destruction, prejudice and pain. Seeing all of these celebrities, influencers and friends posting their support to achieve racial equality is inspiring. In a world where we are so divided, it is magnificent to see how many individuals coming together for justice. Of course, in our generation there are so many people who do things without having any sort of genuine intention and do not actually care about achieving change. Simply, people just mindlessly posting things just to say that they did it, when the reality is some people just want that validation of seeming like a good enough person. 

Without the black community, life would not be the same as it is now. Some of my favorite fashion trends actually originated from the black community. Nail art and having an aesthetic of long, elaborate nails has been a staple trend for the black community. This was a way that women used to express themselves and featured their own personality through their nail art. People used to refer to this nail trend to be “ghetto” since it was not a basic French tip or nude nail that a white woman would typically get. This trend of having intricately designed nails has become more commonly associated with the Kardashians versus the actual black women who made them popular. Sneaker culture is a trend that has become more popularly accepted as a source of style, comfort and personality. In the 70s, the perspective of sneakers changed since they were closely connected to basketball and hip hop. There are so people who did not agree with hip hop and the message that it conveyed, so people assumed everything was bad about it; from the individuals who rapped and wore clothes that supported the music. Without the black community, we would not have any concept of streetwear, whether it be high-end or everyday clothes. This trend originated from individuals wearing their everyday clothes and how black owned brands became increasingly popular in the 90s, which then caused white owned brands like Tommy Hilfiger and Ralph Lauren to enter in this market. One final staple, accessory that everyone has in their closet is a pair of gold hoops or chunky jewelry. In the 60s, wearing large, gold hoops became popular for women of color to wear in streetwear because it was a way for them to embrace their culture. Later on, in the 70s, 80s and 90s, this trend of wearing chunky, gold jewelry was an iconic accessory in streetwear, clubwear and in the hip hop and rap scene. There are many other communities that use gold jewelry as a representation of their culture, but the black community recognizes this a freedom and it gave them a sense of unity in a white-washed world where they have been deemed this accessory choice as being “ghetto.”

Since I am not black, I will never be able to completely understand this community’s everyday fears and how much society has done to intentionally preserve this inhumane inequality they struggle with everyday. However, this doesn’t mean that just because I don’t relate in this situation, I would turn the other way and ignore what is happening in the world. In a way, this can relate to how some men feel whenever a woman gets raped. There are a few, good guys who will stand up for women because it is the right thing to do, even though the situation does not pertain to them. One personal mantra I live by is to always stand up for the right thing even if you’re alone. I literally cannot comprehend the thought of deliberately thinking less of someone just by the color of their skin. 

People are entitled to their opinion, it is their right to have an ideal viewpoint. However, this rule does not apply whenever we are talking about basic human rights that people should just automatically have. In what world, is it ever okay to shoot and murder an innocent black man?? Why do we live in a country where the government is so power-hungry that they do not have any concern for the people they intentionally will not let flourish? This movement has taught me so much about how life really is like, and it opened my eyes up to see a completely different picture. White privilege is a prevalent thing in America and it is concerning to know all the incidents our government has covered up. It bothers me how, there is nothing I can do on my own to change the system and to finally make it fair. There are a lot of documentaries and movies about the history and challenges of this movement for racial equality. Being able to watch this history and hear real people’s stories, saddens me because no human should ever be treated the way people of color are. One documentary I watched on Netflix is 13^th, it is an informative timeline of the growth of the prison systems and how the American government is skewing the process to keep black people in jail longer. There has been so many comparisons of the justices that have been served to black and white people and it is nowhere near comparable. People do not even realize this, but the government is purposefully taking away the rights of African Americans, that their ancestors spent centuries fighting for. Not just corrupt cops who murder and arrest innocent people, it’s also the judges who give harsher sentencing to black people versus a white individual. Crime does not have a skin color; each case needs to be focused on the person and not just the color you see outside. 

There are ways that we can create change and establish a more beautified society by continuing to fight for everyone’s justice.
https://blacklivesmatter.carrd.co

** Aloe Vera **

Aloe Vera gel is my forever go-to natural product for my skincare, hair and nutrients. I have a few of my own plants and they grow back rapidly after you cut off its leaves so once you buy one plant you’ll have Aloe Vera forever. The gel inside the leaf is what provides the most beneficial ingredients. My favorite way to use Aloe Vera is as a skin moisturizer. In the morning, after I put on my daily sunscreen, I always add a small, dime size amount of Aloe Vera gel to my face. It is rich in vitamin A, C and E, these minerals help prevent breakouts, promote healing and supports healthy cell functions. By using Aloe Vera on your skin, it is a good way to prevent some blemishes from occurring versus healing already formed acne. Somedays whenever my skin is not looking the best and I can see a blemish on the way, I like to mix apple cider vinegar and Aloe Vera together and use it as a toner after I wash my face. I mix about ¼ cup of apple cider vinegar and 2 table spoons of Aloe Vera, then I use a cotton ball to rub the mixture all across my face.

I use Aloe Vera gel for many different ways to help nourish and style my hair. Whenever I notice my hair is looking drier, I add Aloe Vera to my conditioner because it gives my hair additional shine and helps reduce the dandruff that I get whenever my scalp is extra dry. One thing that I tried while trying to find a good curly haircare line, is Aloe Vera. I use this natural gel to help hold my curls together. Some days, whenever my hair is freshly washed, I put the Aloe Vera gel all around my hair and use my fingers to create a few spiral shaped curls. This is a really great product to use that won’t make my hair feel like it’s full of product and it still manages my curls.

Another way that I typically use Aloe Vera is by consuming it for the nutritional value that it holds. By eating this plant, it helps keep your digestive system moving and healthy, along with providing value vitamins and amino acids. I add a scoop to my morning green tea in order to start my day with a good digestive movement or I will add a few cubes in my salad for additional texture. The actual Aloe Vera gel does not have a distinct taste but it reminds me of bitter jelly whenever it is by itself.

** Sunscreen Everywhere**

Here’s a question…Would you rather look 30 whenever you’re 80 or 80 whenever you’re 50?

Just Wondering, if you want to look young forever then all you have to do is moisturize. Literally, that is it. Every single day, you need to apply a generous amount of moisturizer to your face and neck. In the morning, it is important to apply a moisturizer that has at least 30 SPH in order to maximize the amount of UV rays that are blocked. The more exposure you have to the sun’s powerful rays, the more prone you are to having age spots, wrinkles and moles. I try to avoid the sun as much as possible, but whenever I am out, I ensure to always have sunscreen on. At night time, I use a moisturizer that does not contain sunscreen because I am not going outside, and I like to have a nice clean slate whenever I wake up in the morning. Emphasis on moisturizing your neck, because in case you didn’t know your neck ages as well. If you do not moisturize your neck right now, then you may notice that you have little bumps that can resemble chicken skin. By simply moisturizing your neck, you can avoid having rough looking skin and you will prevent further signs of aging on your face and neck.

** Two Piece Fit **

Today, I created a bikini out of an old remnant piece of fabric I found in my sewing cabinet. I was actually planning on creating it yesterday, but my sister needed my help unpacking her entire house, so I wore the fabric as a tie top instead. It was super easy to create this 2-piece set, I left my sewing machine in Denton, so this project required no sewing at all. Initially, I cut the bottom of the bikini to fit like a regular swimsuit bottom that needed to be tied together on each side. Then I cut 7 pieces of fabric that would be long enough to use as straps for the top and bottom. After having the cut strips, I hand sewed four individual strips to each corner of the bottoms in order to secure them on the side. Once the bottoms were done, I cut 2 triangle shapes from the fabric and used safety pins to create a makeshift hem. Later, I inserted a strap through the hem closure in order to create a way to secure the back. Once this strap was attached, using safety pins, I added one strap on each side of the top to create the halter-bikini type closure.

** Smoothies and Salads **

During the summer, I am mainly always in a swimsuit by the pool just hanging out. So, I try to use this time to remain fit and healthy. I noticed that it is hard for me to meet my required goals for my daily fruit and vegetable intake. It is easy to drink a smoothie or eat a salad that has both fruit and vegetables in it. In my smoothies, I like to add in carrots, spinach, kale, beets, celery, cucumbers and tomatoes to my regular fruit smoothies to make sure I get all my veggies as well. Whenever I make myself salads, I typically eat them as a whole meal, so I try to add a variety of fruits and vegetables to fill me up. I like to add strawberries, blueberries, raspberries, coconuts, cherries, and oranges. In my opinion, taking the extra time to add in a mixture of both fruit and veggies is more beneficial for you, since you are going to eat that meal anyways, why not kill two birds with one stone.

Hey baby kitties, I hope you all are doing amazing and learning to flourish during this really weird time. There is nothing I want more than being able to go back to a record store or a thrift shop. Meanwhile, we are all in the same boat, enjoying our time in the comfort of our homes, right. I was doing pretty good about being home, but I just miss my friends and being able to hang out with other people. 

Tomorrow is my best friend’s birthday and I’m kind of sad that I’m not able to hang out with her and that she has to be stuck at home. Honestly, I am so grateful I went to Tech for a little bit because I met my life long best friend. Emma is the most kind-hearted, funniest, self-assured woman I know. I am thankful for all the times she’s uplifted me when I’m down, serenaded me with her angelic voice or just talked to me on the phone for the entire day. It’s about to be a whole year after Emma convinced me to get our baby kitty tattoo. cI’ve been wanting to go to the Grand Canyon for so long and she’s the only one who’s down to get in the car right now. This crazy woman has pushed me in life to be a better version of myself and I can’t even imagine all of our insane future adventures. ❤ Love you Yemmi!!   

One new, fun, exciting thing in my life is that I’m learning French now!! How ironic that I already went to France and still just started learning. By the way, Rosetta Stone is having a special where students can get 3 months free, if you want to challenge yourself and learn a new language. The main reason I decided to start learning more French is because I was inspired after binge watching Making the Cut on Amazon with my mom. Let me tell you, this show is sensational. It is hosted by my all-time project runway forever legends Heidi Klum and Tim Gunn. The concept is to boost already established brands into a globally known fashion name. To be honest, I don’t understand any of the rules in the show because there aren’t really any?? The designers buy their fabric wherever and whenever they want, and they don’t really have a specific set budget. There is also not a consistent way of being eliminated, but I like how you never know where the next challenge will be. Plus, if you to know anything about me is that I love Chanel and my goal is to have insane Chanel blazers. Soon enough.. So, naturally I knew I would love this show whenever I realized my favorite 90s Chanel icon Naomi Campbell was a judge. The entire reason I was so inspired by this show was because I definitely feel that now I have exactly what it takes to build up a badass brand. I know how to sew and some people on this design show, had no clue to how sew their own clothes. Yes, the designers were given a seamstress and they just had to create a tech pack, which in the real world that’s how it’s like to actually manufacture clothing. In my opinion, I think it is just good to have a variety of skills if you’re going to start a clothing brand. You should be able to design and break down your clothes in order to be able to sew it on your own if you have to. 

While being at home alone with nothing to do I realized that I need to be open to all the different opportunities that can potentially come my way. My entire life I had this vision of living in New York but thinking about how close that time is going to be, I’m not closing out any other probable route. I’m realizing that I’m just not mean enough to live in the city. After going out to the beach alone for the past 2 weeks, I realized how much I actually love being at the beach and my body really cannot survive in the cold. So, of course I have to be at the beach in California doing something really dope in the LA fashion scene. This will finally be me and Kenny’s time flourish together and start our sublime fashion brand in California. Obviously, right now I don’t have all my ideas planned out because I thought of all this yesterday whenever I was talking to my dad. I was ranting about how I’m just in the phase of my like where I am experiencing everything and passing the time before having to live a true adult life. Not to say that I am not absolutely loving life at the moment, but I just want to be not in school anymore!

Speaking of online school I should say, I am sort of getting swamped with assignments that just creep up on me. I am tired of having so much more work than I ever did in real person class. Do not even get me started about the group assignments because I already was not the biggest fan of collaborative work, but never having the opportunity to meet up and still having to complete a presentation is difficult, but we all have to be tested in life. One of the assignments I had for my retail merchandising class was a research essay on US wholesale market centers. Of course, I studied everything about the most interesting wholesale market places in the United States. From New York to LA and Denver back to Dallas. If this virus would not have happened, I would have gotten the opportunity to work at the Dallas market center, but I will just have to wait until the world clears back up. I learned a lot about the California Market Center and that’s when I realized that that’s where I’m going to end up. I have a really good feeling about it and I’m waiting for life to fall into place. 

Imagine, we are handed a beautiful gift of basically time being stopped while the whole earth remains in a state of paused panic and distress. You are never given the chance to intentionally have nothing to do and just take time to collect yourself. Extra time to stay inside and enjoy the little things that we tend to forget in our fast-paced world. What would you do with your extra time??? Despite what you may be thinking, there is always a positive side to every negative situation. Let’s think about this whole coronavirus fiasco…

It is the most detrimental event to happen in my lifetime and this situation is something that I thought only really happened in the movies. I just sort of thought that in our day and age, we are in a way invincible to everything even though, we are only human. To be completely transparent, at first, I was really scared because this type of thing has never really happened, and I was more scared of the unknown versus what was happening in the present. In my opinion, I think that everyone was more worried about the indefinite outcome versus actually being worried about this virus potentially wiping out the entire population. I can understand why people were worried about supplies and excessively stocking up on toilet paper and cleaning products, but is it really necessary to be that greedy over essential products? Seriously, I just do not understand some people’s mentality. People’s true colors are revealed during a time in crisis. I have always just grown up wanting to help others out and making sure that everyone is doing okay instead of solely focusing on myself. I am very fortunate to be at home with my parents and I do not have to really worry about buying my own food right now, so I decided to give back to the people that really need help. Last week, I made around 30 sack lunches and a casserole to hand out to the homeless people downtown. I know that I am very blessed to be able to have a roof over my head, food in my pantry and enough in my savings to be able to stay home and save other people from potentially getting sick, but others are not as lucky. We need to really think about other’s livelihood and how shutting the whole world down can basically ruin someone’s current life track. This is why I think it is so valuable to be able to help others out during a time of such drastic need. Despite what you believe, karma is a real thing and whatever you do will eventually come back to you…

These past weeks of being isolated and completely left alone with my thoughts, it gave me a new perspective on the world. I’ve been home for however long we’ve been in quarantine and I never realized all the little things that we take for granted. Yes, I am grateful each day for the miniscule opportunities I take for granted such as being able to breathe clean air, drink pure water, listen to good music and dance around wherever I want. Our world basically changed overnight and life as we know it will never be the same. As a whole population, I’m sure there are some things we never thought would be taken away from us. I have not been able to hug my grandparents when I bring them dinner, can’t go to see the newest movie when it is released, unable to sit in church as a whole congregation and I didn’t realize how much I would miss seeing my friends and family in person every day. By having these thoughtless, everyday activities taken away from us, I think we have forgotten what is really important. The entire human race is in such a rush to get back to the quick paced speed of life, but we should use this time to really ponder about what things in life are worth rushing back to. 

Over the past three weeks, I’ve become a new woman…not exactly at all, but I know how to kind of bake. I’ve been taking total advantage about this entire situation and being home without one single responsibility. Okay, I’m lying I have school still, but I’ve been trying to just push through that. I haven’t written a blog in forever because I have been a sponge recently and have tried to just take in everything that is going on around me. The world has finally begun to relax, and it is so much easier to see what is actually going on without the clouded haze of excessive social media posting, intense societal outings and the immense pressure of always having to be doing something. I’ve finally had enough time to sit down and focus on the things that I’ve always wanted to do but claimed to never have time for. I have actually made a decent chunk in the book I’m currently reading, Little Women, and it feels so nice to be able to sit and drink some green tea and read a book without having to worry about doing something else. One thing I have never been really good at is cooking and I lowkey cannot stop eating sweets ever, so I decided to try baking. I’ve been looking up recipes and trying out new desserts. So far, I’ve made some cookies, an apple crisp, cheesecake and banana bread. Not to say I am an advanced pâtissier or anything like that, but I know how to bake now. I’ve also been journaling a lot more and setting time aside to write about not really what I’m doing each day (it’s basically the same thing), but I’ve focused more on what I am feeling and how this has affected me. There was a book that my cousin from California sent me whenever I graduated high school and I never had time to go over all of it. It is 52 lists of happiness and you’re supposed to do it each week, but I never really set aside the time for it each week. I am also so grateful that I brought my record player home because I have finally been able to listen to every single song on all my vinyls. I’ve been passing the days by worrying about having inner peach instead of being so anxious about going back into the world.

There is a great long list of positives I want to talk about that have come from this disaster, but I really want to go on a full tangent about them. Get ready to hear me go off about how amazing mother nature is doing, how the fashion industry is finally getting a break to catch up and people being able to connect with their family during this pandemic..

100 years ago, Women were granted the birthright opportunity of a man to vote. It is kind of hard to imagine life 100 years ago, since we are so technologically advanced our society can barely fathom the idea of a somewhat simple life. During the 1920s (and still to this day), women were not treated as equals to men. Society did not fully understand the innovative ideas, efficiency in situations, creative power and overall knowledge that the female population have always possessed. In the 1800s women were trapped inside their houses having the responsibility of doing the house’s domestic duties. Life dramatically changed for women after World War I, because this was the first opportunity we had to define our equality to the other sex by working the same jobs they used to and managing to take care of a family all at the same time. The 1920s is whenever society was conforming to modern ways and the “new woman” was born. We know that this was the time that women challenged the societal ‘norms’ and started dressing and acting for no one, but themselves. That is the kind of empowerment we need to see.

I think that our problem overtime is that the female gender has forgotten how many women went through a true suffrage in order for us to have the rights that we do today. Women need to be reminded of all the battles that our past sisters went through to get us to this exact moment. There were men who genuinely believed the only place a woman belonged was at home and they had absolutely no right to an education or to a reputable career. Many women had to wait to attend prestigious schools and were often not even recognized for their educational accomplishments. Fast forward a century and we still do not have a woman who has been in charge of the white house.

Contrary to popular belief, I actually care about people other than women and the main thing I want in our world is the dispersal of knowledge and recognition of equality throughout mankind. If you really think about It, our society is educated and cares about things that are oblivious to the intellectual growth that our community needs. People really have no idea what the process is to vote and how you can be an informed citizen to make lawful decisions based on your political views. One thing that really needs to be changed and implemented in our school system is knowledge on how to be an active, law abiding citizen who contributes to the good in society. In high school, they never taught me when to register to vote and which county you need to be registered in while also being on top of deadlines. Whenever I turned 18, immediately I wanted to exercise my right to vote and help be a part of national decisions. I registered to vote whenever I had just turned 18 because I never wanted to miss the opportunity to exercise my right that was not just given to me. At that time, the previous presidential election had already happened, and I still had to wait another 2 years to actually participate. To me, I have always looked forward to the opportunity to vote and create change, so I did my own research on ensuring I was registered in time and I had sufficient knowledge on everyone’s views in order to cast my vote for the best candidate.

There was a previous controversy about raising the voting age to 21 and my opinion is that would create unnecessary tension and will give young adults a reason to not be too concerned with the world around them. Young adults could potentially be the largest demographic of voters who can actually implement change. Dispute your political beliefs, your voice should be heard, and you have the right to express your values. Someone once told me that everyone is a democrat until they grow up and have their opinion. Personally, I am a democrat because their ideals and values represent what I stand for and I want to be a part of a party that actually cares about humanity. The only reason why more people are democrats when they are younger is because we do not have corporate jobs and we do not typically focus our energy on economics or taxation. People tend to be in the same political party as their parents because initially, they are our first exposure to anything relating to politics. My parents are both republicans and that is one million percent not in my beliefs, so I did my own research and picked out my desired political party. One thing that really shocked me when I voted the other day is how some people actually believe other individuals should not be given the same basic human rights as them. I had to vote on if everyone should have access to affordable healthcare, advanced education and if people should be given the choice of a free trial if they commit a crime. My mind was absolutely blown at the fact that people actually think other HUMANS do not deserve the same decent living rights that ‘upper class citizens’ are born with. Lowkey, I wanted to cry because I just did not understand why people do not want someone to have a good quality life.

Young adults have the power to change the world, so why don’t you exercise the right to vote? Now, it is too late to vote in the primary election in order to see who the candidates will be for the presidential election. However, if you are an informed citizen, emphasis on being informed, you don’t want to vote for the president of the United States blinded. You can go to your local voter’s administration office and register to vote in your county in order to be given the opportunity to have a say in the future of our government. If you do not exercise your right to vote, then you have absolutely no right to complain about issues going on in our government or the idiotically actions of our president. It cost absolutely no money to take time to go and vote for what you think is right, so why are you still waiting?